Archive for May, 2009

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Pink admits she loves girls…but her love is pure

Who would have thought that when Pink was holding a chain saw cutting down trees in angst over her ex-husband in one of her more recent videos, deep inside she was really yearning for the touch of a woman to heal her wounds (and help her put all those thoughts about cutting her ex’s penis [...]

Frumpy Liv Tyler out in knee socks

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Ok, we get it, the girl was just coming out of her gym class…but would it kill her to leave the soccer socks and frumpy top buried at the bottom of her closet? If she was the daughter of anyone else other than Steve Tyler we would have ventured to say she stole the socks from [...]

Fergie shows off legs…and a bit of cellulite in jumper

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Oh, we don’t mean to be too critical. After all, Fergie does have a great set of legs (and who doesn’t have a bit of the crater affliction these days?). We just hate the Darth Vader jumper…and really, looking at her from behind, we can’t help think of a toddler with a diaper wedgie (yeah, [...]

Bai Ling is mounting a car for kids with cancer…can’t you tell?

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That Bai Ling sure does have a golden heart…she’ll do anything for children, even if it means pretending to make love to a race car (which required wearing something with a giant slit on the side) at the Qualifiers Celebrity Draft Party (which was really a rally for Kids with Cancer, but had to be [...]

Brooke Shields is well “shielded” in case of a wasp attack

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We wish we could say she was just harvesting honey and that’s why she needed the blue head gear with the netting shield, but Brooke Shields just felt it was the Southern Lady thing to do when watching horses run mad (at the 135th Kentucky Derby). Other crazy-hatted “ladies” at the same Derby were newly [...]

When all else fails, there’s always tanning mist to bail you out

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So now we know why Lindsay Lohan spent so much time out on a surfboard in Hawaii recently (yeah, it wasn’t to escape the paparazzi by tricking them into thinking that was just an abandoned surboard riding the waves)…to get some UV rays to lazer in some much needed beige camouflage for her freckles just in [...]

Victoria Silvstedt just wants to make sure you notice her lips

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In case anyone in the universe of male genitalia did not know that Victoria Silvstedt has huge implanted mammaries and extra-large, but extra-juicy collagen smuckers both of which, er, “stir” genuine emotions and the strong desire to be her Viking…there’s your proof (here at Ocean Club in Marbella doing a free interpretation of a pout)…although, if we [...]

Das Fraulein Victoria Von Beckham returns from Gestabo headquarters

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Victoria Beckham had clear orders upon her return to LAX: gather all the Arian sisters and share the new manifesto on the new extra-padded leather uniforms and er, Louboutin battle footwear…because the movement is in need of a 21st century make-over while still preserving its scary…but fierce Nazi persona… Locky