Archive for February, 2010

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John Travolta’s hair weave

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Here’s a close-up of John Travolta’s head and its suspect of a grid formation along his hairline as he was exiting hotel in Rosny-sous-Bois, France with wife Kelly Preston en route to the premiere of his latest movie From Paris With Love. If we were him, we’d be really pissed at Xenu right now for [...]

Lady Gaga had sex with an oyster

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Here’s Lady Gaga at last night’s AmFar Benefit Gala (The Foundation For AIDS Research) that kicks off Fashion Week in New York City where she performed her new song Future Love looking like she mated with a dozen marine mollusks and then let them finish on her face. Cyndi Lauper was in tow looking like [...]

Angelina Jolie buys Brad Pitt olive tree for Valentine’s Day

If British tabloid The Sun is to be believed, Angelina Jolie bought Brad Pitt a $20,000, 200-year old olive tree at an English nursery near their home in Varbonne, France for Valentine’s Day and plans to plant it in the middle of their French chateau’s garden. And because we prefer to be cynical than dead [...]

Jennifer Garner can make dolphins orgasm

Jennifer Garner stopped by Letterman on Tuesday to promote her upcoming movie Valentine’s day where she told Dave a very relevant story about the time a dolphin put his adorable little fins around her leg and proceeded to ejaculate. We’re guessing to make a point that love (and come) is all around us and we [...]

John Mayer Playboy mess Part III: He breaks down on stage

John Mayer, whose Twitter page is at this moment largely occupied by a detailed apology for using the “nigger” word during his alcohol and sexual frustration fueled  sit-down for Playboy‘s March issue (he admitted his homeless penis hasn’t visited a warm, hospitable shelter in over 24 hours), broke down Wednesday during the “Gravity” portion of [...]

John Mayer’s dick is affiliated with the KKK

Because John Mayer’s interview with Playboy had way too many gems for us to be able to include in just one post, here’s part II, which if we’re right with our estimations will get him shot in the heart by next week, or at the very least cause him the loss of a kidney…or the [...]

John Mayer on the dangers of banging Jessica Simpson…and it doesn’t involve spontaneous brain cell death

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UsMagazine.com got a peek at Playboy’s March issue in which John Mayer once again lets his penis do all the talking. Apparently, Jessica Simpson is so mind-blowing in bed (again, not referring to a man’s brain exploding in a thousand pieces when she asks the question if the earth is flat and if there’s is [...]

Kate Moss’s pubic hair in Love Magazine

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We all know that a photo shoot showcasing Kate Moss’s breasts would be as exciting as watching your grandma knit you a cable sweater since that’s all she does in between breaks from drunk vomiting in her 60 year-old boyfriend’s lap, so Love Magazine thought it prudent to ape the ante by a few notches. [...]