Jessica Alba… you certainly found a way to warm yourself into our hearts. Using your big, poking nipples. This is something that the A-list crowd needs to do more often. If they did, we wouldn’t have to put such a big focus on big bitch losers like Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton. The day that [...]

For just breaking up with her boyfriend Liam Hemsworth, Miley Cyrus isn’t looking particularly slutty or tempting. In fact, she is sort of leaning towards the fat and needs extensive facial surgery. But hell, does she know how to pull off a killer camel impression. We’re not sure if we’re looking at Joe Cool or [...]

Cops have just announced that they have shot James Jay Lee, the man who took hostages at the Discovery Channel building in Maryland earlier today, dead. All of the hostages are safe and accounted for. One of the explosive devices strapped to Lee exploded during the confrontation. Because of these extra weapons, cops say the [...]

Lindsay Lohan wasn’t looking so hot when she was out late the other night at Chateau Marmont… doing nice things like teaching troubled children and brushing puppies, we’re sure. It’s a little unsettling that she didn’t even give the appearance of trying to act like a good little girl once she got back home to [...]

This is less about Heidi Montag retardedly exchanging her dogs with Spencer Pratt as part of their divorce terms… and more about her being FREAKING EVIL. Our boners are very sad to see that Heidi Montag is the incarnation of The First Evil itself. Just look at the furrowed brow, the crazy stare, and the [...]

And the paparazzi bastards must be bored enough to take pictures of Katy Perry’s covered up acne. All things considered, Katy Perry still looks gorgeous even when she has acne. Why? Well, her giant milk jugs and the fact that like any other girl in a civilized country – she covers it up. It’s not [...]

Could it be that she was attached to a gas pump? Sure, she is just famous because she is ridiculously hot. But seriously people, get a damn brain. As you pull away from the gas pump, if you hear tearing, scratching, clanking, and “OH GOD THINK OF THE CHILDREN!” then you might want to stop [...]

Even though she made a song NAMED telephone, which was mainly about the Illuminati or whatever the f*ck it was about, Lady Gaga is now officially afraid of telephones. “There have been various reports suggesting mobile phone use can increase your risk of developing cancer and brain tumours and even though there’s no firm evidence, [...]