Archive for November, 2011

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Mariah Carey is now a Jenny Craig ambassador, flaunts her post-baby figure

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Here’s Mariah Carey baring her midriff in an ad spot for Jenny Craig because according to her she lost 70lbs since giving birth (40 of which were water weight and not a pallet of twinkies) and that entitles her to talk to the poor and underprivileged fatties about, and I’m trying not to laugh here, [...]

Wednesday’s Miscellaneous Junk You Might Like (11.09.2011)

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Oh no, Mickey Rourke is putting more stuff into his face again. That thing’s about to implode any minute now. “Help!! This man told me he will pull my endocrine system out if I didn’t play nice in the sand!!!” 67 year-old Garey Busey with his one-year old son at the park. Wait, someone actually [...]

Filmmaker Brett Ratner resigns after shocking interview with Howard Stern

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Oscar producer Brett Ratner, you know, the guy who likes to eat shrimp and masturbate at the same time according to Olivia Munn, apparently had a really, really bad week. First he brought upon him the fury of the gay mafia by saying at a Q&A last Friday that “rehearsal is for fags”. Then he [...]

Jennifer Aniston might be pregnant

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Jennifer Aniston attended Glamour’s Women Of The Year Awards the other night, and since our job is to stare deeply into breasts and draw conclusions from them about the dreams and hopes of celebrities, we came out thinking they looked a bit pregnanty. Plus, she quit smoking a few weeks ago and she recently bought [...]

Rihanna shares candid pictures from Italy

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Rihanna recently took a break from her world tour to visit the coast of Italy with her girlfriends and despite the apparent lack of penises during this whole cruise it was business as usual for Rihanna. In other words, the scent of swimwear and Coppertone was pungent and there was an unlimited amount of ass [...]

Cat Deeley in a bikini

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Here’s So You Think You Can Dance presenter Cat Deeley in Hawaii on a girls vacation because she’s apparently nursing her wounds from her recent split from True Blood’s Michael McMillian (freaky church leader Steve Newlin) and before I even comment on the bikini pics, does everyone who ever had anything to do with True [...]

Tuesday’s Miscellaneous Junk You Might Like (11.08.2011)

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Someone told me JLo and Jennifer Aniston engaged in some sort of battle of the slits and thighs at Glamour’s Women Of The Year Awards but I was too mesmerized by Donatella Versace’s corpse-like beauty to notice. Iggy Pop is the new face of Paco Rabanne perfume…which I’m assuming smells like unwashed hair and soiled [...]

Candy Spelling wins $90k slot jackpot in Vegas

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File under the posts that want to make you feel more miserable than you already do… Candy Spelling won $90,000 on the slots in Vegas. AGAIN! According to sources connected with the Bellagio Candy and some of her girlfriends were at the hotel two weeks ago when Candy started playing the high limit slots — [...]